When it comes to being in touch
with our feelings, many times it is chaos. In fact, many people associate
feelings with emotions. Feelings and emotions are two different things.
We have a limited capacity to understand
and interact with emotion on a deeper level. We see this in the fact that
different cultures have different words for emotions than feelings, and how
some cultures, particularly Western culture, does not have many of the same
emotional expressions as other cultures. If we want to develop a better
understanding of how emotions work and how we can become more emotionally
intelligent, we need to look at our brain.
According to neuroscientists, we
have three ways to become more emotionally intelligent:
1) Accept emotions are multi-faceted.
The first step in becoming more
emotionally intelligent is to acknowledge that emotional intelligence is a real
thing. To accept it and acknowledge it can help us lead a more meaningful life.
We need to start paying attention to the emotions we have and determining why
we are having those emotions. We are not talking about feelings. Feelings are
the reactions we create about the emotions we have. We must dig deep to
determine the source of our emotions and pay attention to the way they make us
feel. Emotions are responsible of happiness, sadness, or fear. They come first
than feelings.
2) Expand vocabulary.
To become more emotionally
intelligent, we need to increase our vocabulary.
When someone asks how we are
feeling, instead of “fine,” or “good”, let us try using other words to describe
our emotions. Perhaps we are feeling elated,
overjoyed or grief-stricken. There are countless words to describe our
emotions.
3) Create our own vocabulary.
Neuroscientists say that coming
up with new words to use in our emotional intelligence vocabulary can actually
help us tune into our emotions on a deeper level. It can help us develop a more
robust vocabulary to explain our emotions and understand them in a more
meaningful way.
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