It is definitely a skill to set another at their ease and to make an
individual feel like the most interesting person in the room. Charm is
underrated, underappreciated and perhaps just a little misunderstood. It is a
mix of kindness, modesty, agreeableness and politeness.
1. Don’t be afraid to show a little vulnerability
We are conditioned to achieve and to succeed with social and professional
profiles. We have become afraid to show even a chink in our social armour we
have created. However, charming people know that the odd touch of vulnerability
allows others to see them as human, real and approachable.
2. Say less
In our rush to promote our personal brand, the temptation to reiterate
our general fabulousness to all we encounter can be overwhelming. Charming
people do not do this; instead, they are assured within their own skins,
preferring to let others through their significant questioning skills, have
their moment to shine.
3. Look for agreement rather than contradiction
Our professional roles demand that we must challenge decisions,
viewpoints and plans, defend our own position. These skills are invaluable to
us but when not tempered with charm they can easily morph into a combative
stance that colours all of our interactions. Charming people look for points of
agreement, they do not actively look to disagree, but when appropriate, they calmly
offer a different point of view.
4. Extend the same courtesy to all
It often happens that the more important the person you are dealing
with, the greater the oomph you put into your interactions with them. However,
there is something so appealing about a person who treats all the same,
regardless of their position flipping the perceptions of others about who was
worthy of attention.
5. They have a genuine interest in others
There is a difference between a person who has interest in the questions
and a person who has interest in the answers. Charming people are sincere, and
always want to hear and to learn and this is so appealing to others.
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