Search

26/04/2017

Hearing without Listening…



Hearing is a natural skill that we all can do, however not everyone remains present the whole time someone is talking. That is Listening.










When someone else is talking to us, our minds tend to wander and many of us start to think of our response. During this operation, our brain is not capable to absorb the information of our interlocutor.
Our emotions can also interfere with our ability to listen. Sometimes many of us misinterpret what someone is saying because we think that they saying something hurtful or uncalled for. Thanks to evolution, our brain is always looking for threats.

A good conversation has to be friendly, positive and instructive.

Through ‘Active Listening’, we take a step back from our preconceived notions and focus fully on what the person is saying without judging them. However, to achieve that we have to modify some bad habits.

The first bad habit we need to avoid is when we prepare our answer before they have finished speaking. Instead, let us try to be more spontaneous and take our time to speak. Just focus on their words without judging.

The second bad habit is getting distracted. When we find ourselves a little bored in the conversation, our minds wander all the time. It is almost natural. Let us try to focus on the present moment, on the words they are speaking and when our mind drifts, simply return our focus back to what they are saying.

The third bad habit is judging. When we listen to others speak, we naturally put labels and judgments on what they are saying. Just let our mind take the words in without putting a judgment on them.

The fourth bad habit in trying to achieve a certain outcome. This can mean that everything we hear we attach to our preconceived notions about how we should do things. We are not truly listening to what the other person is saying. 

Let us simply “be” in the conversation. We will enjoy the conversation, and we will probably get more out of it too.

Did you listen what I said?

24/04/2017

Empatia: Un superpotere che ci rende unici…

La Genesi - Michelangelo

L’uomo ha sviluppato più di tutti gli altri animali la capacità di partecipare ai sentimenti altrui al punto da poter decifrare e persino anticipare i pensieri e i comportamenti di chi ha di fronte.

Migliaia di anni di evoluzione hanno reso il nostro cervello sempre più potente nel calcolo. Ma la nostra «dotazione» più importante ci ha permesso di stabilire relazioni e di «leggere» nella mente degli altri facendoci provare le loro stesse emozioni. Ecco a voi la Empatia.

L’Empatia è la base della natura sociale dell’uomo. Essa rende possibile l’apprendimento e le relazioni affettive. L’Empatia ci porta a provare le stesse emozioni del nostro interlocutore e quindi anche a superare l’egocentrismo per accogliere l’altro, realizzare interazioni più soddisfacenti, costruire proficui legami sociali.

L’Empatia neutralizza (in parte e non in tutti, purtroppo) il nostro istinto di avere pregiudizi e a costruire barriere. L’Empatia ha consentito la nostra evoluzione e ci ha permesso di realizzare una società come la conosciamo oggi. Le capacità di potere stabilire rapporti con gli altri sono utili a tutti in tutti gli aspetti della vita. Queste doti non sono determinate soltanto dai geni, ma si possono (e si devono) imparare sin da bambini.

Crescendo, attraverso le nostre esperienze e l’osservazione del mondo, impariamo sempre più a capire gli altri e quindi prevederne azioni e reazioni.

La maggior parte di queste abilità si sviluppa nei primi 6 anni di vita, tuttavia è possibile migliorare la nostra capacità di Empatia anche da adulti, con ampi benefici per la nostra convivenza.

La base biologica di tutto questo risiede nei “neuroni specchio” (scoperti negli anni Ottanta, da Giacomo Rizzolatti dell’Università di Parma) che si attivano quando compiamo un’azione ma anche quando vediamo compierla. Esse consentono al nostro cervello di vivere una sorta di “simulazione dell’esperienza altrui”, essenziale per comprendere davvero chi abbiamo di fronte e interagire con lui.

Questa capacità fa parte della Intelligenza Emotiva che non tutti possediamo in ugual grado, ma che volendo, possiamo sviluppare.

Leggere libri di buona qualità aiuta a sviluppare e rafforzare l’Empatia: calarsi nelle storie e immedesimarsi nei panni dei personaggi è come guardare la realtà da un punto di vista diverso e costituisce un efficace esercizio per imparare a interpretare emozioni, gesti e comportamenti del prossimo anche nella vita quotidiana, affinando la capacità di leggere e capire la mente altrui. 

Il nostro cervello sembra disegnato per credere in qualcosa che vada oltre quello che vediamo e tocchiamo. 

Escuela: Padres participativos, aprendizajes efectivos…


En la medida en que los niños pasan de la primaria a la secundaria, la presencia de los padres en las escuelas disminuye cada vez más. 













En la secundaria, los padres visitan a los profesores de sus hijos solamente si hay algún serio problema de conducta o de calificaciones. A veces ni siquiera se molestan en trasladarse hasta la escuela, comunican con los profesores por email…

…“Los padres hoy en día están <demasiado ocupados> para <perder> tiempo en una conversación con los profesores de sus hijos…”

La mayor parte de los padres piensan que todo lo que tenga que ver con educación es responsabilidad de la escuela y de los profesores. Si el alumno obtiene bajas calificaciones o tiene problemas de conducta, es culpa de los profesores.

Así es como las escuelas se convirtieron en <depósitos> en donde los padres dejan a sus hijos por unas horas, mientras se dedican a sus labores (o placeres) cotidianos.

Un mecanismo para lograr reunirse con los padres (sin que ellos lo sientan como una obligación) podría ser organizar, mensualmente, un encuentro en el aula fuera de las horas de clases, con bebidas (no alcohólicas, por favor) y algo para “picar”. Eso le dará un tono de informalidad al encuentro.

Recordemos que al cerebro le gusta divertirse (incluso el de los padres).

De esa manera, a través de placenteras e informales conversaciones, nosotros educadores podemos tener una panorámica más clara y precisa de la situación familiar de cada alumno para así poder consolidar aún más nuestra relación con ellos.

“Para comprender la mente de un alumno, debemos conocer las mentes de sus padres.”

Si logramos establecer una relación empática, de confianza, de estima mutua con los padres, tendremos unos invalorables aliados en nuestro trabajo como educadores.

“Los padres son parte fundamental en el proceso de aprendizaje de los niños.”

22/04/2017

Real world, real school, fake news…


Once upon a time, the biggest enemy to education was ignorance. In addition, false information was rumours in the school playground. The focus in schools was firmly on helping students to acquire knowledge and widen their horizons.

These days, teaching has a similar mountain to climb: how to show students ways of finding what is true in an age of “too much” information.

Trump, for example, has firmly established the principle of “fake news” in the global consciousness. Added to this sea of confusion is the phenomenal infiltration social media has achieved in recent years, creating with it a tsunami of information that has little or no “truth filters” built into it.

For today’s students, there is plenty of information available and ways to acquire it, and the teacher’s role is geared more towards helping them to sort through it with common sense and insight.

It could be argued that future generations of school leavers will need sharpened analytical skills every day of their working lives. Not just to be able to judge between fact and fiction, but also because all industry and commerce of the future is being built on rapidly advancing technology and a massive amount of information (“Big Data”).

The workplace that today’s students will enter is increasingly involved in sourcing, collating, analysing and utilising this massive amount of information – whatever career that ultimately choose.

In the face of so much “data” at their fingertips every day on smartphones and tablets, how do teachers help students make sense of what is real and develop abilities to comprehend and utilise their own “filtering” skills? How can teachers create a generation that uses information effectively, rather than being overwhelmed by it?

Sifting through what is real and fake in news and social media “chatter” can lead to politically sensitive discussions in classrooms. When asked to verify and evidence their views and findings, students may use sources that are debatable in their credibility.
However, teachers are in the best possible position to use these opportunities to show how that there are different sides to every argument and how facts can be manipulated and used selectively to back up opposing views.

A dispassionate and non-political “referee” in the classroom can provide a constructive platform for debate and investigation. Teachers can offer techniques and methods to enable students to make sure that the information they use is valid and credible.
Using the myths and legends propagated by social media, in relation to recent world events, can particularly provide insights into how unfounded information can distort and mislead.
It could well be that developing these analytical and evaluation skills to control and use information becomes part of the future curriculum.

Amongst the ways teachers can help students develop ways to seek out information that is valid and credible is to explain such things as: copyright, how to check the credentials of anyone quoted how to compare information from three of more sources, the relevance of the timeline of the information, and the “age” of the source. In essence, what constitutes a reliable and trusted source?

One subject which can best be used to support analysis and build perceptive students is history. Looking at the past and how political and social history has shaped today’s world gives context to some of the confusing messages they may have to sort through.

The way in which education itself has played a role in identifying and protecting basic human rights is an anchor for learning in an age when “alt-news” muddies the waters. It is impossible to separate the world into “good guys” and “bad guys” without overturning centuries of progression.

There are certainly abundant examples of “fake news” from the past that can show that though it is now prolific, it is not new. Check out the propaganda from both sides of the French Revolution for examples.
One of the ways teachers can enable students to seek out “truth” is to develop the principle of “common sense”. By the very process of exposing that there are “shades” of truth and falsehood in current information, you provide them with permission to use their own natural intuition and evaluation skills.

One of the biggest misconceptions teachers come across in modern classrooms is that if information is available on the internet, it must be true! Fortunately, there are plenty of contradictory samples that can illustrate the need for students to be discerning and apply intelligent reasoning.

Discussions of fake news – and the controversy of current world affairs – may engender a sense of distrust amongst some students that renders them immune to taking in facts. Teachers are again in a unique position to offset this and teach media literacy.

It is right to take in as much information as possible, even what may or may not be fake. Nevertheless, students need to be ready to sort through it using their own intuition and support from reliable sources.

If nothing else, recent world events, the dominance social media has in student’s lives and the advent of Big Data, all combine to provide teachers with an abundance of “teachable moments”.

20/04/2017

Padres Simpáticos. Padres Empáticos.

Muchos padres nos esforzamos por ser simpáticos con nuestros hijos, cosa que es muy importante porque el humor y la diversión son fundamentales para crear un ambiente sano en el hogar pero, a la hora de ser empáticos, las cosas se vuelven confusas.






La observación y la curiosidad son, para mí, la base del Aprendizaje. Observar con atención todo lo que ocurre a nuestro alrededor y preguntarnos el porqué de las cosas, nos aleja de la gran limitadora de nuestras vidas: La ignorancia (del latín ignōrāre: "el no saber").

Muchos padres nos esforzamos por ser simpáticos con nuestros hijos, cosa que es muy importante porque el humor y la diversión son fundamentales para crear un ambiente sano en el hogar pero, a la hora de ser empáticos, las cosas se vuelven confusas.

Los Padres somos los puntos de referencia más sólidos con los cuales cuentan nuestros niños. Eso nos delega una gran responsabilidad y nos obliga a tener claros los conceptos, para así poder transmitirlos de manera efectiva para que nuestros niños desarrollen una buena Inteligencia Emocional.

Empatía y Simpatía (como Apatía y Antipatía) poseen la misma raíz griega ‘pathos’ que significa sentir, pero tienen significados muy diferentes.

Simpatía significa “inclinación afectiva entre personas, generalmente espontánea y mutua”.
Empatía significa “identificación mental y afectiva de un sujeto con el estado de ánimo de otro”.
(R.A.E.)

Nos sentimos cercanos afectivamente a nuestros hijos, estamos genéticamente preparados para ello, tendemos a darles consejos, a minimizar lo que a ellos les afecta, buscamos justificaciones y atenuantes a todo lo que les sucede pero, casi siempre, desde nuestro punto de vista. No vamos más allá tratando de interpretar las cosas desde la realidad de ellos.

La Empatía es una de las Inteligencias Interpersonales más complejas de adquirir. Aunque hay personas que tienen una capacidad innata para establecer empatía con las demás, es una habilidad que se puede ir adquiriendo con la práctica.  

Frente a un dolor o una dificultad del niño, el padre empático se centra en que su hijo necesita ayuda, intenta entender y comprender las emociones de su hijo sin identificarse con ellas y sin compartir su forma de ver las cosas. No se deja llevar por los sentimientos de su hijo, no busca soluciones, no da consejos.

Los niños que tienen padres empáticos establecen mejores relaciones interpersonales.

Tanto la Empatía como la Simpatía son adecuadas y necesarias y pueden utilizarse separadamente, mientras conozcamos muy bien las diferencias.
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...